Juixe TechKnow Predictions 2010

Just like opinions, at the end of the year everyone has their own predictions for the new year. I came to these predictions by reading the back of caps of green tea bottles. If you like to see my accuracy with past predictions see the predictions of 2009.

  • In the future everybody will have their 15 minutes of fame and their own iPhone app on the App Store.
  • The App Store app review process will be even more stringent, opaque, and occult. the App Store will require a vial of blood from each iPhone developer.
  • Steve Jobs has himself cloned and a disk image of his memories will be implanted in the clone.
  • The Apple Tablet shall come with Steve Jobs’ iCommandments.
  • The Google Android platform will explode with hundreds of Android phones on the market, and no app review process for apps. Also the first Android trojan horse virus will affect Android users.
  • Google will release a Google Phone and become a true telephony company with Google Voice.
  • The Google Twins will have a falling out over an argument as to who does less evil.
  • Marissa Mayer, VP of Search Product and User Experience at Google, will leave Google for her own startup where she will develop the next killer web app which consists of a single search field and no buttons or text.
  • Twitter will be hacked, Fail Whale, and Jump the Shark all in the same day.
  • Facebook will buy Foursquare only to let it bit rot like Google did with Dodgeball.
  • Facebook will allow advertisers to impersonate you and post in your friends wall.
  • Zynga will but Facebook and rename it to FarmBook.
  • News Corp will buy Digg for $500 Million only to have all the users migrate over to Reddit.
  • Paul Graham will be deified by entrepreneurs around the world and will be given a mandatory 3% for $10 of all new startups.
  • The US government will award $10 million contract for an installation of WordPress for a government site.

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