Jul
9
2010
From time to time I just blast tweets about software development, project planning, team dynamics, or whatever else comes to mind. Here is a synopsis of recent tweets and rants. If you want to follow the conversation follow me at techknow and/or juixe and I’ll be sure to follow back.
Software Development
- Craftsmanship is not a computer algorithm.
- If models can be super, what can programmers be? Leet?
- Just like you’re not supposed to go to a book by its cover don’t judge an application by its installer
- Some people call it cheating, I call it romantic A/B testing.
- Eric Schmidt’s tie is selected by a computer algorithm that tests over 80 different hues of blue based on his current location and weather.
- I’m not implemented yet.
Team Leadership
- If you don’t remember when you took a vacation last, you need a vacation!
- Money buys opportunities and experiences but not talent or happiness.
- Sometimes work/life balance feels like juggling eggs and frying pans on a tight rope as the audience throws carnival rings at your head.
- Perfection is a deception.
- Be scrappy, not crappy!
- Most people don’t search beyond the first page of the search engine results’ page anymore.
- Thoughts can’t be stolen, only forgotten!
- The truth is never complete.
- Some cover up mistake by making a bigger mistake.
- Facts are nether negative or positive but they are often interpreted as such.
- People can find offense in anything.
Product Placement
- If you want you iPhone 4 to get better reception just don’t touch it or use it.
- And then Steve Jobs said, “Let there be multi-touch.”
- Eating Cheetos and tweeting on an iPad/iPhone is not a good idea. Finger food and finger computing don’t mix.
- If Steve Jobs was president and the BP Oil Spill happened in his watch he would say, “Not that big of a deal. Steve Sent from my iPhone.”
- Steve Jobs should run NASA.
- If Steve Jobs always wears a black t-shirt, does he always wear tidy whities?
- I wish iTunes could organize songs by mood in addition to genre or album.
- Can’t wait until there is a Face Time Roulette service for the iPhone 4!
- AT&T and Apple are using the police as PR enforcers.
- Twitter feels like it was programmed by state programmers in Soviet Russia in the 70’s, it has constant disruptions, is not reliable, etc.
- Mr. Zuckerborg, tear down this walled garden.
- Bill Gates should come out of retirement and run Facebook.
- Scientists should invent self cleaning toilets like they have done for self cleaning oven.
Quote
- Not that big of a deal. Non issue. You are holding it wrong. – Steve Jobs
- Privacy means people know what they are signing up for in plain English. Some people want to share more data. Ask them. – Steve Jobs
- No one single answer is ever the answer to everything. – South Park
- Our Science is great. – South Park
- The devil is in the implementation. – Leo Laporte
- Those who believe in telekinetics, raise my hand – Kurt Vonnegut
- I hate BP, but I admire them too, in the same way I respect the work ethic of serial killers. – Scott Adams
- I have a theory that you should invest in the companies that you hate the most – Scott Adams
no comments | tags: algorithm, development, faceborg, ipod, jobs, leet, oil spill, programmer, schmidt, software | posted in Programming, TechKnow
Jul
5
2010
From time to time I just blast tweets about software development, project planning, team dynamics, or whatever else comes to mind. Here is a synopsis of recent tweets and rants. If you want to follow the conversation follow me at techknow and/or juixe and I’ll be sure to follow back.
Software Development
- Tests? We ain’t got no tests. We don’t need no tests! I don’t have to show you any stinkin’ tests!
- Test. Code. Debug. Refactor. Repeat.
- Party like a rock star, code like a _why.
- Code has a center of gravity.
- There are features that become products, products that become companies, and companies that become revolutions.
- To increase productivity when working with buggy software tools, don’t focus on how it should be done but the work around to get it done.
- Can you imagine only getting paid if there is no bugs in your ode?
- One developer’s bug is another user’s loss of faith in technology.
- Delivery dates for feature sets that there are no specs is a death wish list.
- Running software trumps unwritten specifications.
- I drop fools like I drop database tables, with one SQL statement.
- Memories are backward compatible.
- I dream in quantum bits.
- My dreams are hosted on the cloud.
Team Leadership
- 80% required in swimming is just to have your head above water, the rest is about moving forward.
- I know Google offers employees 20% time, that must be why 80% of their products feel like 80% done.
- Having your head in the clouds is better than your head in the sand! Hold up your head up high and you will see further.
- Make your own path, build your own bridge, be your own light.
- Make work be more wow!
- Future proof your thinking.
- Meeting don’t generate momentum.
- It only takes a single dash to turn a minus into a plus.
- Some set out to follow a leader, others follow his vision, and still others his path. Why not triangulate his geolocation based on all of these?
- A high IQ does not equate with success. I developed a new algo to measure likelihood of success, Kick-ass Quotient, or KQ instead of IQ!!!
- Sweep me off my feet, not under the rug.
Product Placement
- If Zuckerberg would not have created Facebook, he would have been just another picture collector on Craigslist.
- If Facebook would had been invented in the time of Hitler, Zuckerborg might had been a collaborator, aka Little Fuhrer, and would have geolocated Ann Frank
- Facebook is said to release geolocation check-in feature soon, default setting is to notify your parole officer or ex your current location.
- Why isn’t common sense the default at Facebook when it comes to users’ privacy rights.
- BP handling of the oil spill is what I called fail whale, I mean if you kill a whale it is an automatic #failwhale.
- Two guys walk into an Apple store to buy an iPad… This is not a joke, this is a tragedy, they walk empty handed because they are sold out
- Happy Quit Facebook Day!!!
- Flash, there is no app for that.
- Can you imagine a 20 inch iPad? This shall come to pass.
- The iPad is the iPC.
- At Home Depot, just came from Office Depot. Are these stores like related? Can’t wait for Gansta Depot!
- Disney wants to kill your creativity!
- People used to clock-in to work, now they check-in.
- Which is the most hated tech company, Apple, Google, Facebook, Abode???
Quote
- I love the smell of napalm in the morning! – Lt. Col. Bill Kilgore
- You never want a serious crisis to go to waste. – Rahm Emanuel
- Billionaires rule supreme. – P. Sainath
- We made the buttons on the screen look so good you’ll want to lick them. – Steve Jobs
- I wish developing great products was as easy as writing a check. If that was the case, Microsoft would have great products. – Steve Jobs
- Ahhh, what an awful dream. Ones and zeroes everywhere… and I thought I saw a two. – Bender
- A documented bug is not a bug; it is a feature. – James P. MacLennan
- The invisible hand of the market is actually a very visible bunch of grubby paws if you really look. – P. Sainath
- Languages shape the way we think, or don’t. – Erik Naggum
- Shawty is a eenie meenie mo lova – Sean Kingston
- If at first you don’t succeed – call an airstrike. – Banksy
- Lots and lots of blogs does not replace lots and lots of sales. – Larry Ellison
- Baby there is a shark in the water. – VV Brown
- The market is no longer driven by shareholders. The market is driven by formulas. – @mcuban
no comments | tags: banksy, development, faceborg, geolocation, ipad, jobs, refactor, software, tweet, twitter, zuckerbot | posted in Programming, TechKnow, Tools