Apr 18 2011

Retweet March 2011

From time to time I just blast tweets about software development, project planning, team dynamics, or whatever else comes to mind. Here is a synopsis of recent tweets and rants. If you want to follow the conversation follow me at techknow and/or juixe and I’ll be sure to follow back.

Software Development

  • Worst than coder’s block is coder’s shiny tech infinite loop.
  • I got 99 problems and a bug ain’t one.
  • I’m a rockstar ninja guru mofo byte code copy editor.
  • If you could Myers-Briggs test your code what type would your code be and what type of developer would that make you?
  • Are you test driven or bug driven development?
  • Spiderman had his spidey sense and I have my buggy sense and it is tingling.
  • Software bugs can byte my shiny metal ass.
  • Code is a continuum.
  • Mo data, mo problems.
  • Let there be APIs.
  • “Hello, World” is a programmer’s first program. Blog engine is a web developer’s first web app. Consultant’s first product, time management application.
  • Duh, #debugging.
  • Code is never complete.
  • Code less, debug less.
  • I’m a bandwagon programmer!
  • This is not the code you are looking for.
  • I break for bugs.
  • My code runs more than you.

Team Dynamics

  • Passion is not a fruit, it’s a seed.
  • Pitch your passion.
  • Self help gurus first help themselves.
  • If you are waiting for tomorrow you will always be waiting.
  • In the evening be exhausted, in the morning exhilarated.
  • Great ideas don’t join country clubs.
  • Inside a large risk is a large reward, you just need to know how to unwrap it and then monetize it.
  • Meetings begets meetings
  • It’s not how the ball is pitched to you, it’s how you hit the ball, duh #winning.
  • Replace “what if” with “when and how.”
  • The way you think of a problem affects the way you think of the solution.
  • Everybody lives in there own bubble, expand yours.

Product Placement

  • I’m confused as to which photo service we are all supposed to use this month, flickr, picasa, twitpic, instangram, picplz, plixi, color, etc
  • Color app seems like Bump for pictures.
  • Why is the director of the FBI emailing my AOL email account from a io domain?
  • 3G forecast: partly spotty with chances of AT&T fail.
  • Out of all of Apple’s products, Jobs’ best revenue generating product must be the iPhone earbuds. At $30, it has $.50 of material.
  • I’ve lost count, would Google Circles be Google’s third or fourth social networking attempt?
  • Outlook should have a Save As option to save as a Word document.
  • What Google giveth Google taketh away with one change in their algo.
  • Ikea has made a killing by selling designer cardboard.


  • Standards are paper. I use paper to wipe my butt every day. That’s how much that paper is worth. – Linus Torvalds
  • Seeing companies promote their Facebook fan page in advertisements reminds me of when companies promoted their AOL keyword. – @bencasnocha
  • Every software package expands until it can send email. – Zawinski’s Law
  • One great rock show can change the world. – School of Rock


  • How many tweets does it take change a light bulb and start trending?
  • Do you live in the moment or in a hurry to get to the next moment?
  • Is #SXSW the equivalent to #Woodstock but for social media experts and tech hipsters?
  • Forget Scientology, what Hollywood religion is Charlie Sheen practicing where he is a warlock and lives with goddesses?
  • If William of Occam worked at Gillette how many blades would Occam’s razor have?
  • Is Chris Brown the next Dennis Rodman?

The Valley

  • There is a “lifestyle business” bubble.
  • To VCs, startup founders are like dogs to be sorted by pedigree.
  • Is it a bubble if you can’t afford to invest in a seed round?
  • Everybody is scared of a little bubble.
  • Forget about building a better mouse trap, think about building a better people trap.
  • Some party like a rock star, I party like a VC.


  • Single sign-on is something that should be native in the browser.
  • Love thy neighbors, like thy Facebook friends, and retweet they twitter followers.
  • People like liking.
  • Tell me what smart phone you have and I’ll tell you everything about you, especially of you have it unlocked.
  • Terms of Service do not void your constitutional rights.
  • Love thy neighbors, like thy Facebook friends, and retweet they twitter followers.
  • If there ever is a a zombie attack just remember that the Googleplex has the biggest brains, Hollywood and Washington not so big.


  • Mr. Zuckerberg, tear down this walled garden.
  • Mr. Jobs, fix my iPhone.
  • I think Aaron Sorkin should write a treatment for a movie based on Stuxnet.
  • Jeff Bezos to serialize his brain and store it Amazon’s cloud and allow developers to access it via an API.

Japanese Earthquake

  • My heart goes out to the Fukushima 50 and all the search and rescue workers.
  • I have the same feeling, level of disbelief and sense of magnitude, about Japan now as I did about New York after September 11.
  • Earthquake + Tsunami + Nuclear + Meltdown = (Me Praying for the People of Japan)^8.7
  • Wow, the Japan quake at 8.9 is 700x stronger than the Haiti earthquake.
  • There is no match to the “shock and awe” that Mother Nature can produce in matter of minutes.
  • I <3 Japan
  • Stay strong Japan! If there is any country that can recover from two nuclear bombs, multiple Godzilla attacks, and a 8.9 quake Japan can.

Aug 20 2010

Retweet July 2010

From time to time I just blast tweets about software development, project planning, team dynamics, or whatever else comes to mind. Here is a synopsis of recent tweets and rants. If you want to follow the conversation follow me at techknow and/or juixe and I’ll be sure to follow back.

Software Development

  • If developers think that QA is going to find all their design problems, they are doing it wrong.
  • Code wants to be dynamic.
  • Unlike what it sounds like, Extreme Programming isn’t a spectator sport where you jump off a ramp with your favorite IDE.
  • The web needs an open standard API for user badges and achievements.
  • Social network sites should adopt a open standard API for user badges and achievements!
  • The user interface made me do it!
  • Show me the money, show me the data.
  • Technology will date you, as in it will give away your age, like if your used a floppy vs a thumb drive vs neural memory implant..
  • I’m sure Hallmark has a card for that, to show our appreciation to the QAs in our lives.
  • The meek shall inherit the earth, the geek shall inherit an earth simulation on some social virtual game running on the cloud.
  • Can you debug dreams?
  • Men are digital, women are analog.
  • Refactor yourself!
  • Trust No Technology

Team Leadership

  • Good things come to those that make them happen.
  • Cut out the 20% from Pareto’s Principle from your process.
  • Follow your dreams and you will be your own leader!
  • Our attitude affects the outcome of our experiences and that is reflected in our perspective which influences our attitude.
  • Fear is a virus of the mind!
  • Some people are proud instead of productive.
  • Sometimes we need to accept and move forward before we can understand.
  • One persons Epic Fail is another’s FTW!
  • If you don’t remember when you took a vacation last, you need a vacation!
  • There are somethings that we are just not going to understand, but that we need to accept.
  • If better is not easier and cheaper then it’s not.
  • Just because something is better (function) doesn’t mean it’s better (form).
  • You have to feed, exercise, and train your creativity before you can make it work for you.

Product Placement

  • GIA: Google Intelligence Agency. FBI: FaceBook of Investigations.
  • Is Facebook too big to fail or just big enough to get regulated?
  • And then Steve Jobs said, “Let there be multi-touch.”
  • Cost Plus World Market should really rename itself to 3rd World Market since they mostly sell trinkets from under developed world.
  • CVS has the widest and weirdest selection, they sell everything from hard liquor to underwear. It’s basically my party supply store.
  • Someone should invent foursquare for fictional places, I would like to check I the Star Wars Cantina.
  • I wish iTunes could organize songs by mood in addition to genre and album.


  • OH: Awww, that gansta cute.
  • OH: Travel is my drug of choice, I rather go on a real trip than a hallucinogenic trip.
  • OH: I woke up so tired from that dream because I was running in it.
  • OH: It’s very hard sometimes to think on your own.
  • OH: when you are a parent and are dealing with your kids, you have to be the bigger person.
  • OH: I’m sorry for whatever I did in your dream that made you upset, trust me that is not typical of my behavior in other people’s dreams.
  • OH: It’s not that you did anything wrong, it’s that you didn’t do anything spectacular.


  • Bulls make money. Bears make money. Pigs get slaughtered. – Anonymous
  • Everyone specializes in their own area of weakness. – Rothbard’s Law
  • Software is getting slower more rapidly than hardware becomes faster. – Wirth’s Law
  • It is not how much you make that counts, but how much money you keep. – Robert Kiyosaki
  • All these computers and digital gadgets are no good. They just fill your head with numbers and that can’t be good for you. – Prince
  • Hope. Deleted – Emotionless Wine Bucket #futurama
  • There are no traffic jams along the extra mile. – Roger Staubach
  • Control the music industry? Check. Control the publishing industry? Check. Control-alt-delete? Never. – @ceoSteveJobs
  • I bet if they had Yelp in 1850, nobody would have taken the Oregon Trail. – @badbanana
  • People don’t like to be sold, but they love to buy. – Jeffrey Gitomer
  • Welcome, to the real world. – Morpheus
  • I’m sorry, Dave. I’m afraid I can’t do that. – HAL
  • Would you rather your kid be a drug dealer than a drug addict? – John Waters