Juixe Techknow

From time to time I just blast tweets about software development, project planning, team dynamics, or whatever else comes to mind. Here is a synopsis of recent tweets and rants. You can follow my tweets at techknow, say hello and I’ll be sure to friend back!

Programming

• Don’t be a one track mind, and don’t be a one stack developer!
• If a picture is worth one thousand words, a running and working application is worth one thousand specifications!
• In software development there are more people issues than there are issues with specifications or features or code.
• Can we use the internal defect tracking software to enter a bug issue on people that bug you?
• Sophisticated does not need to be complicated.
• Nerds don’t dance, they programmatically move their limbs in unison.
• Writing blocks of code and upgrading your whole library dependency is rarely a practical solution that clients are willing to pay for.
• Will Code for Happiness!
• I don’t make itineraries, I use public map APIs and RSS feeds and make apps that make travel itineraries for me!
• Throwing money at a problem only cause other type of problems.
• Instead of counting backwards, a good sobriety test for a nerd is to recite the Fibonacci sequence or prime numbers or powers of two.
• Numbers don’t lie, but they omit how they where gathered, analyzed, and crunched.
• There is no better code than the one I am currently working on, and their is no worst code than the one I wrote a year++ ago.
• Can’t sleep so I’m hacking memories into dreams, counting tweets instead of sheeps, drinking tequila instead of warm milk.
• Do you think in a procedural, object oriented, tail recursive, domain specific, prototype, meta, functional or parallel quicksort of way?
• There is no I in TEAM especially when there is blame to pass around. Sometimes blame get passed around more than the ball.
• In problem solving some people also prematurely optimize and over think the problem at hand by introducing another problem.
• Some people have Personal Assistant, I need a Personal Programmer.
• Some drop bombs, others drop beats, some drop bunker buster knowledge, many more drop opinions, I drop bytecode!
• In temperate and sunny days like these I develop an allergic reaction to my cube.
• Textbook answers alone are not solutions. Chanting ‘Interface Singleton Builder pattern’ in meetings does not fix all your design issues.
• Booksmart peeps give you text book answers, but I’ve never needed to know when two trains arrive in Toledo if the leave opposite directions.
• Writing a twitter client is the new hello, world!

Business

• Google New Customer Service Motto: Don’t Be Evil and Don’t Be Available!
• Google has mapped the streets, oceans, earth, heavens. What will Google map next, the brain, underworld, middle earth?
• Why doesn’t the iPhone have a good way to delete multiple pictures at once? Am I to wait two years for this just like cut and paste!
• Can I put a restraining order out on Adobe Acrobat, it always pops up and asked if I want to upgrade! NO LEAVE ME ALONE!
• Wowza, still downloading more Kindle books on my iPhone. This makes my digital library even more accessible.
• I should pitch a nre series to ABC, Dancing with the Nerds.
• Odwalla’s Superfood is the veggie version of the hot dog in a green liquid form, it is mechanically separated and blended roots and fruits.
• What? Mark Zuckerborg is on Twitter? Is that like eating your own dog food and your competitor’s dog food too? Say hello to Mark: @finkd
• How do you politely handle a coworker coming to your office and talking about his cat? I rather be clawed to death than hear about it again.
• Customers want answers not theories.
• Show more interest in your customers than their money.
• You can’t win every argument just by being right, just as you can’t win market dominance just by having the superior product.
• It took years, well over a decade, since it’s invention for slice bread to become the greatest thing since.
• Eventually everyone sells out, if not to the establishment then to the anti-establishment.
• It is okay to wear multi hats as long as you wear your kick ass army boots.
• Save or create jobs? I just saved a job by going to work! I need a tax break and a coffee break.
• Before you can build a better mouse trap, fix your toaster.
• I’m going to make a Ol’ McDonald style burger and on this burger I’ll have beef, bacon, turkey… EI EI O
• Best Job Tittle: Aggression Researcher You Stupid Bastard!
• Just received an email from the recruiting agency my company uses, the had to layoff some staff.
• Some people hustle for money, I hustle for deals.
• There are three forms of questioning: conversation, interview, interrogation.
• My 401K looks like it did during Y2K
• Blogging is not a business plan.
• Which do you prefer first, action or planning?
• Between action or planning I prefer active planning!
• Don’t let a show stopper actually stop the show! The show must go on! Break an audience member’s leg if you have to!
• Rules and regulations should not replace common sense.
• Talking is not communicating, an idea is not a vision, and an opinion is not a sound argument.
• Don’t compete with those that are trying to help you.

Twitter

• Twitter fail whale is over weight and over capacity!
• Twitter is too big to fail! Twitter’s business model should be asking the Obama administration for a bailout?
• If you don’t have anything nice to say, retweet.
• There is famous, 15 minute famous, and then there is Twitter famous.
• If Twitter is poor man’s email, who is the slum dog millionaire’s email?
• Can’t hardly tell the diff between a twitter and a tweaker.
• Twitter should allow you to customize the question ‘What re you doing?’ to anything else like ‘Talk to me.’